NBA: Recasting the Monstars from ‘Space Jam’ as NBA players
By Gaia Rhodes
DeAndre Jordan as Bang
Bang is the green Nerdluck. In the original he stole the abilities of Patrick Ewing, one of the greatest all around centers ever. He retired with career averages of 21 points, 9.8 rebounds, one steal, and 2.4 blocks per game. He was a force on both sides of the ball.
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Our Monstars team we have constructed so far is an offensive juggernaut, but we need a defensive anchor. Michael Jordan is one of the best, most creative finishers in NBA history. That anchor needs to be an athletic shot blocker who can challenge MJ at the rim.
Enter DeAndre Jordan. The All-Defensive First Team center will have his hands full to say the least, but should be up to the challenge. DeAndre is a solid comedy actor as well.
In a series of State Farm commercials DJ plays a tall, blonde woman, and absolutely steals the show. He has a rare combination of athleticism, shot blocking, and comedic abilities that make him the perfect choice for our Monstars center.
Our Monstars team is stacked with scorers now. We have stud defenders at the PG, SF, and C positions, and everyone of them is a sound acting choice. This is a team that could challenge Michael Jordan’s Tune Squad, and keep he movie funny at the same time.
Next: Ranking the 10 best point guards in the NBA
A remake may be down the line, but for now I’m going to enjoy the original Space Jam; and fantasize about ways to improve the Nerdluck’s Monstar team. Because why not?