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NBA: Recasting the Monstars from ‘Space Jam’ as NBA players

By Gaia Rhodes

Feb 5, 2015; Cleveland, OH, USA; Cleveland Cavaliers forward LeBron James (23) and Los Angeles Clippers forward Blake Griffin (32) stand together in the third quarter at Quicken Loans Arena. Mandatory Credit: David Richard-USA TODAY Sports
Feb 5, 2015; Cleveland, OH, USA; Cleveland Cavaliers forward LeBron James (23) and Los Angeles Clippers forward Blake Griffin (32) stand together in the third quarter at Quicken Loans Arena. Mandatory Credit: David Richard-USA TODAY Sports /
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Apr 3, 2016; Houston, TX, USA; Houston Rockets guard James Harden (13) celebrates after scoring a basket during the third quarter against the Oklahoma City Thunder at Toyota Center. The Rockets won 118-110. Mandatory Credit: Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports
Apr 3, 2016; Houston, TX, USA; Houston Rockets guard James Harden (13) celebrates after scoring a basket during the third quarter against the Oklahoma City Thunder at Toyota Center. The Rockets won 118-110. Mandatory Credit: Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports /

James Harden as Blanko

The Monstars did not have a shooting guard on the roster. If we are going to beat a Michael Jordan led team we need to have a shooting guard.

Blanko is the blue Nerdluck. In the original he stole the abilities of Sean Bradley. Bradley is one of the tallest players in NBA history at 7’6. He was a solid big man who excelled at blocking shots, despite the highlight reels accentuating how often he got dunked on at times. Despite being the tallest player on the Monstars squad, Bradley was probably the team’s worst rebounder after the 5’3″ Bogues. He was also the least talented of the team’s two centers. So, this is the big man we’ll drop.

The 7’6″ Stormin’ Mormon brought some great physical comedy to the table. His lanky frame also lent itself well to being animated. Our Monstars SG will be James Harden, one of the NBA’s most gifted scorers. He also has tremendous facial hair that would look great done in a Looney Tunes style animation. He’s also a funny actor.

Harden is featured in a series of footlocker ads with Colin Farrell. Farrell provides the voice of Harden’s inner confidence, giving him suspect advice. Harden shows a a gift for physical comedy in these ads.

This, combined with his skills on the court, make James Harden our Monstars SG.

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